Difference between revisions of "Jonathan Dorf"
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Jonathan Dorf is an evil alien monster from the planet GorbleFlarp. King of the GorbleFlarpians, he commands his followers with an iron fist! | Jonathan Dorf is an evil alien monster from the planet GorbleFlarp. King of the GorbleFlarpians, he commands his followers with an iron fist! | ||
Writing plays is his profession. They usually suck ass, but if anyone ever says that, they are killed immediately. | Writing plays is his profession. They usually suck ass, but if anyone ever says that, they are killed immediately. | ||
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Every morning, he wakes up and looks at his naked body in the mirror, and while tears run down his cheeks he scream 'why' loud enough to wake up the neighbors. | Every morning, he wakes up and looks at his naked body in the mirror, and while tears run down his cheeks he scream 'why' loud enough to wake up the neighbors. | ||
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After his daily 'wanting to be a woman' phase passes, he gets on his computer and looks at some animal porn before starting the rest of the day. | After his daily 'wanting to be a woman' phase passes, he gets on his computer and looks at some animal porn before starting the rest of the day. | ||
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Here is a typical day in the life of Jonathan Dorf in 15 easy steps: | Here is a typical day in the life of Jonathan Dorf in 15 easy steps: | ||
First thing on his list is to look at some animal porn. | First thing on his list is to look at some animal porn. | ||
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Secondly, he makes some breakfast. | Secondly, he makes some breakfast. | ||
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Thirdly, he makes his bed and gets dressed. | Thirdly, he makes his bed and gets dressed. | ||
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Fourth, he looks at more animal porn. | Fourth, he looks at more animal porn. | ||
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Fifth, he continues looking at animal porn. | Fifth, he continues looking at animal porn. | ||
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Sixth, he goes outside and follows people (usually young males)around for a couple hours, just for fun. | Sixth, he goes outside and follows people (usually young males)around for a couple hours, just for fun. | ||
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Seventh, he chooses one of the people he's been following as his "target", which he follows home and rapes, just for fun. | Seventh, he chooses one of the people he's been following as his "target", which he follows home and rapes, just for fun. | ||
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Eighth, he goes back home and looks at some more animal porn. | Eighth, he goes back home and looks at some more animal porn. | ||
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Ninth, watches his favorite movie "I Heart Animal Porn" starring him. | Ninth, watches his favorite movie "I Heart Animal Porn" starring him. | ||
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Tenth, after watching himself being rapped by a horse, he pops in little mermaid and begins masturbating to that as well. | Tenth, after watching himself being rapped by a horse, he pops in little mermaid and begins masturbating to that as well. | ||
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Eleventh, next comes The Lion King. | Eleventh, next comes The Lion King. | ||
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Twelfth, Aladdin (sing-along version). | Twelfth, Aladdin (sing-along version). | ||
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Thirteenth, one last animal porn viewing before it's time for bed. | Thirteenth, one last animal porn viewing before it's time for bed. | ||
| − | + | Fourteenth, Brushes his teeth, | |
| − | Fourteenth, Brushes his teeth | + | |
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Fifteenth, goes to bed, where he will no doubt dream of the animal porn he will look at tomorrow. | Fifteenth, goes to bed, where he will no doubt dream of the animal porn he will look at tomorrow. | ||
Revision as of 18:32, 1 December 2007
Introduction
Jonathan Dorf is an evil alien monster from the planet GorbleFlarp. King of the GorbleFlarpians, he commands his followers with an iron fist! Writing plays is his profession. They usually suck ass, but if anyone ever says that, they are killed immediately.
Every morning, he wakes up and looks at his naked body in the mirror, and while tears run down his cheeks he scream 'why' loud enough to wake up the neighbors.
After his daily 'wanting to be a woman' phase passes, he gets on his computer and looks at some animal porn before starting the rest of the day.
Here is a typical day in the life of Jonathan Dorf in 15 easy steps:
First thing on his list is to look at some animal porn. Secondly, he makes some breakfast. Thirdly, he makes his bed and gets dressed. Fourth, he looks at more animal porn. Fifth, he continues looking at animal porn. Sixth, he goes outside and follows people (usually young males)around for a couple hours, just for fun. Seventh, he chooses one of the people he's been following as his "target", which he follows home and rapes, just for fun. Eighth, he goes back home and looks at some more animal porn. Ninth, watches his favorite movie "I Heart Animal Porn" starring him. Tenth, after watching himself being rapped by a horse, he pops in little mermaid and begins masturbating to that as well. Eleventh, next comes The Lion King. Twelfth, Aladdin (sing-along version). Thirteenth, one last animal porn viewing before it's time for bed. Fourteenth, Brushes his teeth, Fifteenth, goes to bed, where he will no doubt dream of the animal porn he will look at tomorrow.
Movies that he's been in
- I Heart Animal Porn (written and acted by Jon Dorf and his trusty horse)
