Fings ain't Wot They Used t'Be (1986)
by Frank Norman & Lionel Bart
Directed by Mike Mattey
Performances: Sat 4th – Sat 11th October (Gala Night Tues 7th) 1986, Bell Theatre
Contents
Introduction
Fred runs a failing gambling joint in a seedy Soho Side-street and harbiiurs dreams of making a come-back to the halcyon days when he was "razor king of the manor".
Lil has retired from the oldest profession in the world and dreams of marrying Fred while she sweeps the floors around the feet of the tarts, ponces and layabouts who are Fred's only customers.
Sargeant Collins is the "Friendly" local policeman who controls the "patch" and incidentally absorbs any rofit that Fred might otherwise make. The Sargeant's dream is to own a place like Fred's and be the one that pays and not just the one who 'cops' the bribes.
Paddy, the jovial tea-man; tosher, the ponce: Betty and Rosey, Tosher's blousy tarts; Redhot, the old lag and Norman, the leader of the local Teddy boys are among the other dreamers who have made Fred's gaff their home.
When a horse does Fred a good turn all these dreams look like coming true and Horace, the designer, is on hand with plenty of gay ideas to put some of them into immeadiate effect. But gang boss, Meatface Heiman, stands in Fred's path and the only way back to the top is through a 'carve-up' with Meatface and his mob. Very Nasty!
But "Fings Aint Wot They Used T'be" is above everthing else and entertainment with lots of laughs and songs for everyone. It's a theatrical knees-up for all the family - a chance to forget your troubles and join in the fun.
Mike Mattey
This Production was sponsored by Midland Bank.
Cast
- Frederick Cochran - John Lyne
- Lily Smith - Sally Maclean
- Paddy - John Hartnett
- Segeant Collins - Terry Barden
- Betty - Ann Richards
- Rosey - Sally Lill
- Tosher - Matthew Lyne
- Redhot - Dennis Packham
- Horace - Alan Buckman
- Poliemen - Simon Vaal & Paul Hummerson
- Norman - Godfrey Jansen
- Busker - Sue Thompson
- Gamblers - Juliet Male & Bill Pavey
- Percy - Alan Buckman
- Myrtle - Sue Thompson
- Priest - Simon Vaal
- Teddy Boys & Girls - Jeanette Hoile, Gillian Holmes & David Groves
- Newsboy - Sue Thompson
- George - John Salmins
Crew
- Designed by - Alan Buckman
- Musical Director - Bill Pavely
- Stage Manager - June McAuliffe
- Assistant Stage Managers - Carol Saunders, Robin Lill, John Kidd & John Salmins
- Lighting - Brian Fretwell
- Choreography - Malcolm Flint
- Set Constrution - Canice McAuliffe with David Lamkin, Dick Lilley & Robin Lill
- Wardrobe - Ann Mattey
Reviews
Some review quotes go here
Gallery
Reminiscences and Anecdotes
The Second night looked quite different to the first. I added an extra 4 1,000 watt lights geled to bright colours for the musical numbers after seeing the first full performance. Brian Fretwell.
See Also
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Or add anything that is related within this site. The author's page for instance or other plays with a similar theme.
References
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